Wedding n funeral
I enjoy doing wat most gals do, fantasizing n planning my wedding years ago. It's a process I enjoy indulging in over the years. I think of the gowns, the location, the march in songs, song for the champagne pouring, song for the commencing of the 1st dish (no, it's not kitaro nor the final countdown), how I would like the seats to be done.The theme, the color, which ballroom I liked. Who's gonna be my flower gals, my ring bearer, my bridesmaid. I 've played the 'Ah yee' roles several times. I 've collected so many datas n info from the countless weddings I've attended. All the way to the last details, even the make up artist n hairstylist. I almost became a wedding planner (toyed abt the tot at least), even when I wasnt seeing anyone. I was certain that would happen one day. Yes, u might think I sound pathetic. Maybe I am. I've even bought several Home n Decor. Yes, I was determined to be a bride.
But no, not anymore. If it happen, it happens. I acknowledge that the only things certain in life are death n taxes. A wedding might never exist in a lifetime but death will definitely happen once. Recently, I acquired a new hobby. I start planning my death, my funeral. No, I m not suffering from depression, far from it. Maybe it's a repercussion from the exam I was preparing for a mth ago, Tax n estate planning.
I start thinking abt writing a will, the song would I like to play on my funeral, wat to do with my personal effects after I died. I jus finished a novel, PS, I love you by Cecelia Ahern. IT's abt this widow who had lost a very loving hubby to brain tumour. She was only 30. She received 10 letters a mth after his death addressed to her to help her cope with his death.A letter each month. Every letter ended with PS I love you hence the title of the book. It's a good read, very moving.
In the process of thinking abt my death, I dun feel sad surprisingly. I gathered my insurance portfolio, my CPF statments n the miserable savings n shares I held.
Total: I have approx 500k to dispense to my loved ones.
I would definitely leave majority of it to my mum who brought me up n took care of me though I know she wouldnt really need my money. I have 3 working siblings who will provide for her. I would like to leave aside 100k to my dad so he can buy a place of his own n not have to worried abt the roof over his head. But as he have a gambling habit, I would set aside the money under discretionary trust under my sister, who have all the right n discretion to dispense the money to him as she deemed fit.
I would like to leave 25k for my brother who might be getting married in a few years time. That would probably help him in a headstart in his new life. 25k for my nephew education. 50k to my elder sis who always dreamt of staying in a condo, that would be able to help her with the cash downpayment of a modest condo. She work very hard with my bro in law in a church hence they do not draw a volunptuous pay package.
As for my second sis, She would inherit the house that I set aside for my dad as her retirement income. My sisters would inheirt all my precious handbags n designer shoes.
If I know when I m dying(suffering from terminal illness), I would like to buy my family a holiday as a surprise for them, 6mths after I ascended to heaven. They would have gotten over the grief by then n the holiday would be a good bonding time for my family n destressed themselves. It's been so long since our whole family go for a holiday.
As I think abt all the above, I realised I was smiling to myself. I m happy. If I were to die, I want my family to be taken care of, I want to make their dreams come true. I want my loved ones to celebrate my existence n embrace my death. I m proud to be a part of my family n I loved every single one of them though we have had countless fights.
It's so impt to leave a will behind even when u do not have a huge estate. Here's a few impt steps to take;
1) Consolidate yr assets (insurance) n liabilities
2) Make provision for yr remaining debts, loans, estate duty
3) Determine how much u have left to dispense to your loved ones
4) Think abt who's yr dependants n how long they might need the money (eg; till a child finish tertiary education)
5) Anyone in yr mind that u would like to give a gift to (be it close friend in need or a charity that u support)
6) Allocate them in the way u want to. IF u have insufficient to dispense, u might like to increase yr insurance coverage to create an immediate estate after ur death.
7) Consult a lawyer if u need advice. U should review yr will every year or 2 or everytime when u change status (eg; marriage, divorce, death of a dependant)
Give it some serious thought, it's one of the most important thing pple failed to do, or they avoid doing it coz death isnt exactly a happy issue to talk abt. But like it or not, whelther we plan it or not, death is always there, we jus dun know when.
When done properly, it can minimise discord n confusion. It harness unity among the family n help them cope with the grief easier. Losing a loved one is bad enuff, but that's something not within our control. But we can do something to help our loved ones cope. Leaving a will will let yr loved ones know u loved n planned for their future. They will know they are loved. My will will end with ;
PS: I Love you
But no, not anymore. If it happen, it happens. I acknowledge that the only things certain in life are death n taxes. A wedding might never exist in a lifetime but death will definitely happen once. Recently, I acquired a new hobby. I start planning my death, my funeral. No, I m not suffering from depression, far from it. Maybe it's a repercussion from the exam I was preparing for a mth ago, Tax n estate planning.
I start thinking abt writing a will, the song would I like to play on my funeral, wat to do with my personal effects after I died. I jus finished a novel, PS, I love you by Cecelia Ahern. IT's abt this widow who had lost a very loving hubby to brain tumour. She was only 30. She received 10 letters a mth after his death addressed to her to help her cope with his death.A letter each month. Every letter ended with PS I love you hence the title of the book. It's a good read, very moving.
In the process of thinking abt my death, I dun feel sad surprisingly. I gathered my insurance portfolio, my CPF statments n the miserable savings n shares I held.
Total: I have approx 500k to dispense to my loved ones.
I would definitely leave majority of it to my mum who brought me up n took care of me though I know she wouldnt really need my money. I have 3 working siblings who will provide for her. I would like to leave aside 100k to my dad so he can buy a place of his own n not have to worried abt the roof over his head. But as he have a gambling habit, I would set aside the money under discretionary trust under my sister, who have all the right n discretion to dispense the money to him as she deemed fit.
I would like to leave 25k for my brother who might be getting married in a few years time. That would probably help him in a headstart in his new life. 25k for my nephew education. 50k to my elder sis who always dreamt of staying in a condo, that would be able to help her with the cash downpayment of a modest condo. She work very hard with my bro in law in a church hence they do not draw a volunptuous pay package.
As for my second sis, She would inherit the house that I set aside for my dad as her retirement income. My sisters would inheirt all my precious handbags n designer shoes.
If I know when I m dying(suffering from terminal illness), I would like to buy my family a holiday as a surprise for them, 6mths after I ascended to heaven. They would have gotten over the grief by then n the holiday would be a good bonding time for my family n destressed themselves. It's been so long since our whole family go for a holiday.
As I think abt all the above, I realised I was smiling to myself. I m happy. If I were to die, I want my family to be taken care of, I want to make their dreams come true. I want my loved ones to celebrate my existence n embrace my death. I m proud to be a part of my family n I loved every single one of them though we have had countless fights.
It's so impt to leave a will behind even when u do not have a huge estate. Here's a few impt steps to take;
1) Consolidate yr assets (insurance) n liabilities
2) Make provision for yr remaining debts, loans, estate duty
3) Determine how much u have left to dispense to your loved ones
4) Think abt who's yr dependants n how long they might need the money (eg; till a child finish tertiary education)
5) Anyone in yr mind that u would like to give a gift to (be it close friend in need or a charity that u support)
6) Allocate them in the way u want to. IF u have insufficient to dispense, u might like to increase yr insurance coverage to create an immediate estate after ur death.
7) Consult a lawyer if u need advice. U should review yr will every year or 2 or everytime when u change status (eg; marriage, divorce, death of a dependant)
Give it some serious thought, it's one of the most important thing pple failed to do, or they avoid doing it coz death isnt exactly a happy issue to talk abt. But like it or not, whelther we plan it or not, death is always there, we jus dun know when.
When done properly, it can minimise discord n confusion. It harness unity among the family n help them cope with the grief easier. Losing a loved one is bad enuff, but that's something not within our control. But we can do something to help our loved ones cope. Leaving a will will let yr loved ones know u loved n planned for their future. They will know they are loved. My will will end with ;
PS: I Love you
posted by Birkenstocker at 9:31 AM
3 Comments:
Serious but touching post here. Most people are too afraid to even think about death that they dont even prepare a will, much less think about the planning that you did.
P.s: To you query on my blog, I am a guy. Though my gal will blog from time to time. I guessed you read her entry that day.
What will be your epitaph when you die?
I got me entire tombstone all planned out. heh.
Talk about forward planning
Oh, I remember when my grand dad was close to death one time, and all my aunts and uncles were bitching and quarreling about inheritence.
My mom didn't want anything to do with it, and they made her mediate. Made her cry. And I FUCKED every one of my relatives for it.
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